SUMMARY POINTS
You’re scrolling social media in your lunch break when you see it.
That picture that stops you in your tracks.
You know the one - the happy, attractive, successful, and perfect photo of a model life.
The one that brings out all of your insecurities.
It’s because you don’t feel beautiful. You hate what you see in the mirror every day and you can’t help but compare yourself to other people.
You’re carrying more than a few extra pounds.
Your hair seems to be getting thinner by the day.
You even have acne, which you thought you’d left behind as a teenager.
You feel incredibly insecure about how you look.
And that inner asshole in your head is shouting really loudly. It’s always putting you down and telling you that you’re not worthy and that you’re not beautiful.
You want to shrink into the background so no-one notices you.
Whether you realize it or not, you’re sabotaging yourself.
You’re stuck in a never-ending cycle of negativity that you can’t break free of, and it’s stopping you from reaching your potential.
You can’t do your best work with all of this noise in your head. You doubt your ability. You constantly tell yourself you’re not up to the job.
It takes you forever to get started on projects and even harder to keep motivated.
You end up cyberloafing which inevitably leads to crushing effects of procrastination. And ultimately, your productivity goes down the shitter.
Getting back on track depends on silencing your inner critic and believing that you’re worthy of success. And it all starts with cultivating your inner beauty.
That picture that stops you in your tracks.
You know the one - the happy, attractive, successful, and perfect photo of a model life.
The one that brings out all of your insecurities.
It’s because you don’t feel beautiful. You hate what you see in the mirror every day and you can’t help but compare yourself to other people.
You’re carrying more than a few extra pounds.
Your hair seems to be getting thinner by the day.
You even have acne, which you thought you’d left behind as a teenager.
You feel incredibly insecure about how you look.
And that inner asshole in your head is shouting really loudly. It’s always putting you down and telling you that you’re not worthy and that you’re not beautiful.
You want to shrink into the background so no-one notices you.
Whether you realize it or not, you’re sabotaging yourself.
You’re stuck in a never-ending cycle of negativity that you can’t break free of, and it’s stopping you from reaching your potential.
You can’t do your best work with all of this noise in your head. You doubt your ability. You constantly tell yourself you’re not up to the job.
It takes you forever to get started on projects and even harder to keep motivated.
You end up cyberloafing which inevitably leads to crushing effects of procrastination. And ultimately, your productivity goes down the shitter.
Getting back on track depends on silencing your inner critic and believing that you’re worthy of success. And it all starts with cultivating your inner beauty.
What Is Inner Beauty?
Who decides what “beautiful” means?
Usually, it’s society.
If you don’t fit these ideals, it’s easy to feel like you’re not attractive. But your looks don’t say anything about who you are as a person.
And here’s the thing. We all know people who are “beautiful” on the outside and pure ugly on the inside.
You probably also know people who aren’t conventionally beautiful but they light up a room with their presence. They give off such positive vibes that it boosts everyone else’s mood around them.
It’s because real beauty comes from within.
It’s your positive habits, core behaviors, and values that make you attractive, not your physical appearance.
How you treat other people and the attitude you present to the world is far more important than what you see in the mirror.
Inner beauty shines much brighter than outer beauty. It’s also something that’s in your control.
Usually, it’s society.
If you don’t fit these ideals, it’s easy to feel like you’re not attractive. But your looks don’t say anything about who you are as a person.
And here’s the thing. We all know people who are “beautiful” on the outside and pure ugly on the inside.
You probably also know people who aren’t conventionally beautiful but they light up a room with their presence. They give off such positive vibes that it boosts everyone else’s mood around them.
It’s because real beauty comes from within.
It’s your positive habits, core behaviors, and values that make you attractive, not your physical appearance.
How you treat other people and the attitude you present to the world is far more important than what you see in the mirror.
Inner beauty shines much brighter than outer beauty. It’s also something that’s in your control.
How To Grow & Strengthen Your Inner Beauty
You’ve heard of the phrase, “Karma’s a bitch” right?
Well, the opposite is also true. Karma’s a savior.
It works both ways - that’s how the universe works. There’s no hard science that can prove this. However, you can use this principle to grow and strengthen your inner beauty.
The key thing here is to open up your inner beauty and let it out into the world.
Eventually, it will come back to you and when it does, it makes you feel so fucking awesome that you put more of it out there again. This creates a self-perpetuating upward spiral that keeps your inner beauty going strong.
It can even get to the point where it will help you get over the biggest struggles in life. You’ll be able to move mountains.
The challenge is how do you find and maintain your inner beauty when you feel so shitty about yourself?
The answer is by starting in small steps and being consistent.
Building inner beauty isn’t something you’ll achieve overnight. Karma doesn’t return the favor right away. It takes time. You’ll need to work hard to reap the benefits.
Try these positive habits to shift your mindset towards inner beauty.
Well, the opposite is also true. Karma’s a savior.
It works both ways - that’s how the universe works. There’s no hard science that can prove this. However, you can use this principle to grow and strengthen your inner beauty.
The key thing here is to open up your inner beauty and let it out into the world.
Eventually, it will come back to you and when it does, it makes you feel so fucking awesome that you put more of it out there again. This creates a self-perpetuating upward spiral that keeps your inner beauty going strong.
It can even get to the point where it will help you get over the biggest struggles in life. You’ll be able to move mountains.
The challenge is how do you find and maintain your inner beauty when you feel so shitty about yourself?
The answer is by starting in small steps and being consistent.
Building inner beauty isn’t something you’ll achieve overnight. Karma doesn’t return the favor right away. It takes time. You’ll need to work hard to reap the benefits.
Try these positive habits to shift your mindset towards inner beauty.
1) Identify & Share Your Good Qualities
One of the biggest reasons why supposedly “beautiful” people often appear super ugly?
It’s because you can’t see any good qualities in their personality.
They’re not kind, compassionate, or caring. They don’t give a shit about other people. They’re more likely to leave you feeling even worse about yourself.
When you have inner beauty, none of this applies. Your good qualities are immediately obvious and it draws people to you.
Think about the best parts of your personality. What kind of good qualities do you have? The more you have, the more you can share and the stronger your inner beauty shines.
It’s because you can’t see any good qualities in their personality.
They’re not kind, compassionate, or caring. They don’t give a shit about other people. They’re more likely to leave you feeling even worse about yourself.
When you have inner beauty, none of this applies. Your good qualities are immediately obvious and it draws people to you.
Think about the best parts of your personality. What kind of good qualities do you have? The more you have, the more you can share and the stronger your inner beauty shines.
2) Be Kind To Others
Since inner beauty is linked to how you treat people, kindness is your secret weapon for keeping it strong.
This study from China shows the impact of qualities such as kindness and honesty.
Researchers showed people photos of 60 female faces, all of whom had neutral facial expressions (no smiling, which could have skewed the results). They were asked to rate how attractive the women were, and repeat this again two weeks later.
But this time, researchers assigned the photos personality traits. They told one group that the people in the images had positive personality traits such as honesty and decency. For the other group, it was negative traits.
Did this affect how attractive they found the photos? You bet!
The positive personality group rated the photos they viewed as being most attractive while the negative personality group deemed theirs least attractive.
If people think you have a good heart, your inner beauty takes precedent.
To make this even more powerful, you can turn your best qualities into positive affirmations. It’ll shift your mindset so you start noticing your positive qualities. You can boost your self-esteem and cultivate your inner beauty.
This study from China shows the impact of qualities such as kindness and honesty.
Researchers showed people photos of 60 female faces, all of whom had neutral facial expressions (no smiling, which could have skewed the results). They were asked to rate how attractive the women were, and repeat this again two weeks later.
But this time, researchers assigned the photos personality traits. They told one group that the people in the images had positive personality traits such as honesty and decency. For the other group, it was negative traits.
Did this affect how attractive they found the photos? You bet!
The positive personality group rated the photos they viewed as being most attractive while the negative personality group deemed theirs least attractive.
If people think you have a good heart, your inner beauty takes precedent.
To make this even more powerful, you can turn your best qualities into positive affirmations. It’ll shift your mindset so you start noticing your positive qualities. You can boost your self-esteem and cultivate your inner beauty.
3) Practice Daily Gratitude
Feeling incredibly grateful for what you have is a great way to cultivate inner beauty. It’s also a simple trick for triggering happiness at work.
Gratitude literally rewires your brain. It forces your brain to think positively and creates an “attitude of gratitude”. It’s a huge mindset shift that makes you happier and healthier.
You can dial down that inner critic that’s been in total control until now.
Gratitude teaches you not to compare yourself to others.
This study from the University of Calgary sums it up. Gratitude helps you to feel better about who you are and where you’re at. That’s incredibly powerful for your self-esteem. Plus, it helps build the core behaviors and values that underpin inner beauty.
Here’s how to make it work for you.
Try doing short gratitude observations throughout the day. You can do this on your lunch break or when you’re stuck in traffic. Or even on a bathroom break. Anytime you have a few spare minutes, spend them thinking about things you’re grateful for.
The roof over your head.
The food on your table.
Cuddles with your kids.
A random act of kindness from a stranger.
The warmth of the sun on your face.
Still having a job.
Anything that gives you a reason to be positive and grateful is all you need.
You can also do guided meditation exercises that focus solely on gratitude. It’s an easy form of meditation to do whenever you’ve got the time. If you need help focusing your mind toward gratitude, this is a great starting point.
Either way, the more you practice gratitude, the more it builds your gratitude muscle.
Gratitude literally rewires your brain. It forces your brain to think positively and creates an “attitude of gratitude”. It’s a huge mindset shift that makes you happier and healthier.
You can dial down that inner critic that’s been in total control until now.
Gratitude teaches you not to compare yourself to others.
This study from the University of Calgary sums it up. Gratitude helps you to feel better about who you are and where you’re at. That’s incredibly powerful for your self-esteem. Plus, it helps build the core behaviors and values that underpin inner beauty.
Here’s how to make it work for you.
Try doing short gratitude observations throughout the day. You can do this on your lunch break or when you’re stuck in traffic. Or even on a bathroom break. Anytime you have a few spare minutes, spend them thinking about things you’re grateful for.
The roof over your head.
The food on your table.
Cuddles with your kids.
A random act of kindness from a stranger.
The warmth of the sun on your face.
Still having a job.
Anything that gives you a reason to be positive and grateful is all you need.
You can also do guided meditation exercises that focus solely on gratitude. It’s an easy form of meditation to do whenever you’ve got the time. If you need help focusing your mind toward gratitude, this is a great starting point.
Either way, the more you practice gratitude, the more it builds your gratitude muscle.
4) Repeat Positive Affirmations
Speaking it out loud manifests your inner beauty. Your brain can’t tell the difference between reality and what you want to happen.
When you repeat positive self-affirmations to yourself, your brain learns them as truths. The more you do them, the stronger the effects.
Try these examples to get you started.
“I am worthy”
“My beauty shines from within”
“My beauty radiates from my heart”
“The more I believe in myself, the more attractive I appear”
“I love everything my body does for me”
You get the idea. For more examples and details about self-affirmations, check out this article on how “I Am” affirmations can kick start your day.
You’re teaching your brain that beauty isn’t about your physical looks and that it’s what’s inside that counts.
It might sound like a weird one but it works.
This study published in Social Cognitive and Affective Neuroscience used functional magnetic resonance imaging (fMRI) to see what happens in the brain during self-affirmations.
Here's what they found.
Positive affirmations activate the reward centers in your brain and bring pleasure. It’s like when you eat your favorite food and it tastes so good.
They also stimulate the parts of the brain linked to self-related processing. When you’re confronted with information that you’d normally find upsetting or threatening, positive affirmations can buffer you against the effects.
With every affirmation, you’re making yourself more resilient. You know you’re worthy of success. It’s easier to silence your inner critic. And that’s a massive game-changer for success at work.
Pretty amazing, right?
Just make sure your positive affirmations are rooted in the future or the present, not the past, to get the most from them.
When you repeat positive self-affirmations to yourself, your brain learns them as truths. The more you do them, the stronger the effects.
Try these examples to get you started.
“I am worthy”
“My beauty shines from within”
“My beauty radiates from my heart”
“The more I believe in myself, the more attractive I appear”
“I love everything my body does for me”
You get the idea. For more examples and details about self-affirmations, check out this article on how “I Am” affirmations can kick start your day.
You’re teaching your brain that beauty isn’t about your physical looks and that it’s what’s inside that counts.
It might sound like a weird one but it works.
This study published in Social Cognitive and Affective Neuroscience used functional magnetic resonance imaging (fMRI) to see what happens in the brain during self-affirmations.
Here's what they found.
Positive affirmations activate the reward centers in your brain and bring pleasure. It’s like when you eat your favorite food and it tastes so good.
They also stimulate the parts of the brain linked to self-related processing. When you’re confronted with information that you’d normally find upsetting or threatening, positive affirmations can buffer you against the effects.
With every affirmation, you’re making yourself more resilient. You know you’re worthy of success. It’s easier to silence your inner critic. And that’s a massive game-changer for success at work.
Pretty amazing, right?
Just make sure your positive affirmations are rooted in the future or the present, not the past, to get the most from them.
5) Don’t Compare Yourself To “Beautiful” People
Comparing yourself to other people is unproductive. You feel inadequate and inferior because you think they look “better” than you. And you waste a ton of time beating yourself up for everything that’s “wrong” about yourself.
What you don’t remember is that people present the image they want you to see, especially on social media. They’ve spent hours editing their photos, adding a million filters, and writing the perfect text. They probably don’t even look like that in real life.
The only person you should compare yourself to is you.
The real problem is that you don’t value yourself. You use outside sources such as beauty to measure your worth. And you gloss over how capable you truly are.
But here's the thing.
No-one else is the same as you and that’s your superpower. You’re beautifully unique and it’s time to embrace that.
There’s a great quote that gets to the heart of this.
“Why compare yourself with others? No one in the entire world can do a better job of being you than you.” ~Unknown
Everyone is on their own unique journey. The only one that matters is yours.
What you don’t remember is that people present the image they want you to see, especially on social media. They’ve spent hours editing their photos, adding a million filters, and writing the perfect text. They probably don’t even look like that in real life.
The only person you should compare yourself to is you.
The real problem is that you don’t value yourself. You use outside sources such as beauty to measure your worth. And you gloss over how capable you truly are.
But here's the thing.
No-one else is the same as you and that’s your superpower. You’re beautifully unique and it’s time to embrace that.
There’s a great quote that gets to the heart of this.
“Why compare yourself with others? No one in the entire world can do a better job of being you than you.” ~Unknown
Everyone is on their own unique journey. The only one that matters is yours.
6) Smile More
Smiling is one of the easiest ways to boost your inner beauty. It triggers a chemical reaction in your brain, which makes you feel happier and more confident.
Even a fake smile can do the trick. Your brain can’t tell whether you’re genuinely happy or not, so the effects are the same.
To get you started, here are 101 things to smile about right now.
The effects of smiling also extend to other people too.
Smiling is contagious and people feel compelled to smile back. They’re drawn to you and feel the good vibes you’re sending out. It gives them a mood boost, and even if they’re having a bad day, receiving a smile can instantly make them feel good.
Give it a try today. Smile at everyone you meet for a day and see how many do the same.
Even a fake smile can do the trick. Your brain can’t tell whether you’re genuinely happy or not, so the effects are the same.
To get you started, here are 101 things to smile about right now.
The effects of smiling also extend to other people too.
Smiling is contagious and people feel compelled to smile back. They’re drawn to you and feel the good vibes you’re sending out. It gives them a mood boost, and even if they’re having a bad day, receiving a smile can instantly make them feel good.
Give it a try today. Smile at everyone you meet for a day and see how many do the same.
7) Be Kind To Yourself Too
It’s not just about being kind to other people. You also need to be super nice to yourself too.
Your inner critic can be a bitch. It’s been keeping you stuck in misery. Your negative thoughts have a big effect on how you feel and how you act. It’s why negative self-talk about your looks is having a significant impact on your work happiness.
Your self-talk can do the opposite too. It can help you to see your inner beauty and feel more content, no matter how you feel about your looks.
Dialing down your inner critic can be challenging, especially if negative thoughts are the norm for you. Practice saying nice things to yourself every day and start changing the way you see yourself. Show yourself the same compassion you’d show to family and friends.
Be your own cheerleader. Use your self-talk to lift yourself up instead. Your positivity will uplift and inspire other people too.
It also doesn’t hurt to give yourself a bit of “me-time” every day.
Your inner critic can be a bitch. It’s been keeping you stuck in misery. Your negative thoughts have a big effect on how you feel and how you act. It’s why negative self-talk about your looks is having a significant impact on your work happiness.
Your self-talk can do the opposite too. It can help you to see your inner beauty and feel more content, no matter how you feel about your looks.
Dialing down your inner critic can be challenging, especially if negative thoughts are the norm for you. Practice saying nice things to yourself every day and start changing the way you see yourself. Show yourself the same compassion you’d show to family and friends.
Be your own cheerleader. Use your self-talk to lift yourself up instead. Your positivity will uplift and inspire other people too.
It also doesn’t hurt to give yourself a bit of “me-time” every day.
How Inner Beauty Leads To Work Happiness
Cultivating your inner beauty has powerful effects, especially at work. The positive habits that underpin inner beauty can be a powerful tool for being successful and happy in your job too.
Here are some of the things that happen when your inner beauty starts to shine.
Here are some of the things that happen when your inner beauty starts to shine.
1) You’re More Ambitious
Feeling insecure about your looks can leave you moping in the background, afraid of being judged. You don’t push for that promotion or ask for a raise. And you’re stuck in the same place you were five years ago.
But harnessing the power of your inner beauty can turn this around.
Those positive habits you’ll be cultivating will stop you from wanting to hide away from life. You’ll recognize your value. You won’t want to stay stuck in your comfort zone anymore.
You’ll know you can do more and you’ll want to take on challenges beyond your comfort zone. Not because you have to. You’ll actually want to. You’ll be excited to see where you can go in your role.
But harnessing the power of your inner beauty can turn this around.
Those positive habits you’ll be cultivating will stop you from wanting to hide away from life. You’ll recognize your value. You won’t want to stay stuck in your comfort zone anymore.
You’ll know you can do more and you’ll want to take on challenges beyond your comfort zone. Not because you have to. You’ll actually want to. You’ll be excited to see where you can go in your role.
2) You Communicate Better
When you hate your physical looks, you try not to draw attention to yourself. You believe people will be judging your appearance so you keep your head down and stay quiet and unassuming.
Inner beauty is different. You know your looks aren’t the focus - it’s what you have to offer that matters. You feel better about using your voice and being heard. You have more confidence. Hell, even your whiteboarding skills are kickin’ ass.
You speak up when you’ve got too much on your plate. You offer your opinions in meetings. You communicate your needs instead of doing what’s best for everyone else. And all because your inner critic isn’t running you down all the time.
Inner beauty is different. You know your looks aren’t the focus - it’s what you have to offer that matters. You feel better about using your voice and being heard. You have more confidence. Hell, even your whiteboarding skills are kickin’ ass.
You speak up when you’ve got too much on your plate. You offer your opinions in meetings. You communicate your needs instead of doing what’s best for everyone else. And all because your inner critic isn’t running you down all the time.
3) Your Work Is Better
How you perform at work goes hand in hand with your confidence.
When your inner critic doesn’t keep quiet, you doubt your ability to do your job. You believe other people are more worthy of success than you, especially if they’re conventionally attractive. Your insecurities are like a dead weight dragging you down. They're killing your career.
But it’s a different story when your inner beauty is strong. The voice in your head is supporting you and cheering you on. You trust yourself. And, you find yourself getting in the zone more often.
When your inner critic doesn’t keep quiet, you doubt your ability to do your job. You believe other people are more worthy of success than you, especially if they’re conventionally attractive. Your insecurities are like a dead weight dragging you down. They're killing your career.
But it’s a different story when your inner beauty is strong. The voice in your head is supporting you and cheering you on. You trust yourself. And, you find yourself getting in the zone more often.
4) Other People See You Differently
When your self-esteem is low, people sense it. They associate it with being mediocre and dull. Even if you weren’t doing such a great job of holding yourself back, their perception of you is all it takes. As it is, it’s a double whammy of self-sabotage and an inaccurate profile of your true identity.
Having inner beauty means you project confidence. You’re not arrogant, just comfortable about who you are. People notice and your personal brand soars.
Since you’re not fighting a battle inside your own head and your self-esteem isn’t on the floor, your inner confidence signals your competence and ability.
Instead of “I can’t do this,” your whole demeanor screams, “I’ve got this!”.
Having inner beauty means you project confidence. You’re not arrogant, just comfortable about who you are. People notice and your personal brand soars.
Since you’re not fighting a battle inside your own head and your self-esteem isn’t on the floor, your inner confidence signals your competence and ability.
Instead of “I can’t do this,” your whole demeanor screams, “I’ve got this!”.
Grow & Share Your Inner Beauty For More Happiness
Hating how you look can affect every part of your life, including at work. It saps away at your self-confidence and stalls your success.
You can’t change what you see in the mirror but you can affect the power it has over you. Inner beauty helps you to hit your inner critic with a sucker punch. It doesn’t get to tell you how unworthy and ugly you are anymore. You’re calling the shots now.
It’s all about your positive attitude and making the world a better place. Crucially, these habits help make your job more fulfilling and awesomer.
And remember, it’s not going to happen overnight. You gotta keep working on it. Inner beauty is a long-term process but you can grow it every day bit by bit.
Have karma work in your favor. The more inner beauty you can share with the world, the more it will come back to you.
Let your inner beauty shine bright. You deserve it.
Feel Better,
[Cubicle|Therapy]
You can’t change what you see in the mirror but you can affect the power it has over you. Inner beauty helps you to hit your inner critic with a sucker punch. It doesn’t get to tell you how unworthy and ugly you are anymore. You’re calling the shots now.
It’s all about your positive attitude and making the world a better place. Crucially, these habits help make your job more fulfilling and awesomer.
And remember, it’s not going to happen overnight. You gotta keep working on it. Inner beauty is a long-term process but you can grow it every day bit by bit.
Have karma work in your favor. The more inner beauty you can share with the world, the more it will come back to you.
Let your inner beauty shine bright. You deserve it.
Feel Better,
[Cubicle|Therapy]