SUMMARY POINTS
You really don’t like doing it but sometimes, you gotta kiss your boss’s ass.
The worst is when there are other coworkers around to witness you sucking up to your boss. This is because you know you’re doing it and they do too. It’s awful. But, you put on that big smile and go through with it.
It’s getting them a fresh cup of coffee from Starbucks (not the shitty office coffee), buying them small gifts, comping them free tickets to an event, letting them choose the venue, giving them first dibs, picking up their dry cleaning, etc.
Some of these things feel demeaning at times, but you do it.
Why?
Because you don’t want to get passed up for promotion.
Or maybe, your annual performance review is just around the corner.
Or perhaps, it’s because you want to take a few extra days off and you don’t have many vacation days left - wishing for unlimited PTO.
And maybe, it’s simply because you need to form an unbreakable relationship with your manager to get their full support and power so that you get your way on your projects.
Whatever the reason, there are times when you gotta suck up to your boss. There’s really no avoiding it. It’s okay to pucker up your lips to kiss ass every once in a while.
However, if you’re kissing ass all the time, this isn’t good - at all. And, here’s why.
The worst is when there are other coworkers around to witness you sucking up to your boss. This is because you know you’re doing it and they do too. It’s awful. But, you put on that big smile and go through with it.
It’s getting them a fresh cup of coffee from Starbucks (not the shitty office coffee), buying them small gifts, comping them free tickets to an event, letting them choose the venue, giving them first dibs, picking up their dry cleaning, etc.
Some of these things feel demeaning at times, but you do it.
Why?
Because you don’t want to get passed up for promotion.
Or maybe, your annual performance review is just around the corner.
Or perhaps, it’s because you want to take a few extra days off and you don’t have many vacation days left - wishing for unlimited PTO.
And maybe, it’s simply because you need to form an unbreakable relationship with your manager to get their full support and power so that you get your way on your projects.
Whatever the reason, there are times when you gotta suck up to your boss. There’s really no avoiding it. It’s okay to pucker up your lips to kiss ass every once in a while.
However, if you’re kissing ass all the time, this isn’t good - at all. And, here’s why.
Ass Kissing All The Time Isn’t Good
There are legitimate times when you should compliment your boss and give them big kudos. It’s times like when they complete a big project, receive approval for more budget, get recognized by executive management or more simply, it’s their birthday or work anniversary.
During your one-on-one, team meeting, office pizza party or birthday cake celebrations, you can give them kudos and congratulations. That’s totally normal.
However, when you go beyond these occasions and constantly suck up to your boss, it can ruin your credibility, especially when it comes across as superficial and fake.
Many people believe that the key to success at work is kissing up to their boss all the time. They think that by showering their boss with compliments and doing them favors, they will be in the good graces and will be more likely to be promoted or favored.
That’s simply bullshit.
Kissing ass all the time often backfires. Constant brown-nosing will make you look insincere, two-faced and even incompetent. And if your boss isn’t a fucking clueless executive, they will most likely see through your attempts to butter them up.
In some cases, if they get really annoyed, your boss will shut you out of a lot of things. Then, you’ll start falling behind and will be out of the loop.
The other issue is that sucking up to your boss all the time tarnishes your reputation. You don’t want to be known as the office’s biggest ass-kisser who only gets ahead because of how far you have your nose up your boss’s ass.
It’s important to protect and manage your personal brand in the office. And, if your coworkers think that you only do favors for your boss and not for others, there’s less of a chance that they’ll be willing to go the extra mile for you.
During your one-on-one, team meeting, office pizza party or birthday cake celebrations, you can give them kudos and congratulations. That’s totally normal.
However, when you go beyond these occasions and constantly suck up to your boss, it can ruin your credibility, especially when it comes across as superficial and fake.
Many people believe that the key to success at work is kissing up to their boss all the time. They think that by showering their boss with compliments and doing them favors, they will be in the good graces and will be more likely to be promoted or favored.
That’s simply bullshit.
Kissing ass all the time often backfires. Constant brown-nosing will make you look insincere, two-faced and even incompetent. And if your boss isn’t a fucking clueless executive, they will most likely see through your attempts to butter them up.
In some cases, if they get really annoyed, your boss will shut you out of a lot of things. Then, you’ll start falling behind and will be out of the loop.
The other issue is that sucking up to your boss all the time tarnishes your reputation. You don’t want to be known as the office’s biggest ass-kisser who only gets ahead because of how far you have your nose up your boss’s ass.
It’s important to protect and manage your personal brand in the office. And, if your coworkers think that you only do favors for your boss and not for others, there’s less of a chance that they’ll be willing to go the extra mile for you.
Alternatives To Kissing Your Boss’s Ass

We've all been there. You feel stuck at work or career, desperately trying to find a way to get ahead but kissing your boss's ass just isn't an option that you want to pursue. It’s not your thing.
So what do you do?
Well, thankfully, there are plenty of other ways to get ahead without sucking up. There are other ways to build and form alliances with your boss that don’t involve any fakey bullshit antics.
The simple upfront answer - it’s all about being a superstar. And, here’s how.
So what do you do?
Well, thankfully, there are plenty of other ways to get ahead without sucking up. There are other ways to build and form alliances with your boss that don’t involve any fakey bullshit antics.
The simple upfront answer - it’s all about being a superstar. And, here’s how.
Be Proactive & Predictive With Your Boss’s Requests
Guess what? Your boss has a boss too. They’ve gotta deal with a lot more bullshit than you because it comes from above, below and sideways. This is why being in middle management sucks sometimes.
Knowing this, it pays to be proactive and predictive when it comes to your boss's requests or tasks that get dropped in their lap. Anticipating what they need and getting it done before they have to ask will score you major points. And being able to do so with a smile on your face will only sweeten the deal.
Knowing this, it pays to be proactive and predictive when it comes to your boss's requests or tasks that get dropped in their lap. Anticipating what they need and getting it done before they have to ask will score you major points. And being able to do so with a smile on your face will only sweeten the deal.
Deliver On Time Or Ahead Of Schedule
If you're looking to win over your boss, one surefire way is to deliver your work on time or even ahead of schedule. Having to deal with unreliable direct reports only gets your boss more stressed out. So, it’s great if you’re responsive.
This gives them one less thing to track or follow up on and it also provides them with some additional buffer in their workflow to make smart decisions. The benefit is less stress for your boss, which they will truly appreciate.
Just be sure that you’re not sacrificing quality for speed. Handing over work that isn’t complete or is riddled with mistakes will do the exact opposite and piss off your boss.
This gives them one less thing to track or follow up on and it also provides them with some additional buffer in their workflow to make smart decisions. The benefit is less stress for your boss, which they will truly appreciate.
Just be sure that you’re not sacrificing quality for speed. Handing over work that isn’t complete or is riddled with mistakes will do the exact opposite and piss off your boss.
Error-proof Your Work
Continuing from the last sentence above, when you consistently deliver work that is free of errors and your work is tight and polished, your boss will really appreciate this because they don’t have to proofread your stuff, which makes their life easier.
When they don’t have to worry about the quality, they can be confident in including and submitting your work in their reporting. There’s no risk of shit hitting the fan with wrong information.
When they don’t have to worry about the quality, they can be confident in including and submitting your work in their reporting. There’s no risk of shit hitting the fan with wrong information.
Be Rock Solid Dependable
When your boss can count on you to show up on time and get the grunt work done on schedule, it boosts their confidence in you. And, this naturally leads them to favor you over others ‘cause they know that you’ll get in the zone and kick ass.
Being rock solid and dependable is a surefire way to win over your boss because unlike unresponsive coworkers, you never fail and thus, they don’t have to think about backup plans with you.
Being rock solid and dependable is a surefire way to win over your boss because unlike unresponsive coworkers, you never fail and thus, they don’t have to think about backup plans with you.
Strengthen Your Fellow Team Members
If there’s one thing that all bosses want, it’s to have a team that grows stronger and more capable. Some of this can come from training classes to improve skills or from other alternatives.
One of these other alternatives is to share each other’s best practices or hacks to get shit done faster and easier. It’s things like sharing your top 5 Powerpoint image sites, workflow process templates, awesome keyboard shortcuts or any other hacks and processes that will boost team productivity.
One of these other alternatives is to share each other’s best practices or hacks to get shit done faster and easier. It’s things like sharing your top 5 Powerpoint image sites, workflow process templates, awesome keyboard shortcuts or any other hacks and processes that will boost team productivity.
Cross-train For Coverage
If there’s one thing that bosses dread is not having coverage for projects and tasks. This can be from someone quitting, going on vacation, being out sick, going on maternity leave etc.
Bosses don’t typically operate in the weeds like working level folks. They have to operate at higher levels to cover all projects. They don’t have the time or capacity to work on the important details. They have to do more with less.
So, if you’re able to take the initiative and cross-train the team so that everyone can cover each other, it’ll give your boss peace of mind. And when you can give them this assurance, you’ll win them over.
Bosses don’t typically operate in the weeds like working level folks. They have to operate at higher levels to cover all projects. They don’t have the time or capacity to work on the important details. They have to do more with less.
So, if you’re able to take the initiative and cross-train the team so that everyone can cover each other, it’ll give your boss peace of mind. And when you can give them this assurance, you’ll win them over.
Don’t Kiss Ass, Bust Ass Instead

It's no secret that kissing up to your boss can get you ahead in your career. But, is it really worth it to suck up all the time?
Short answer - fuck no.
Brown-nosing all the time is just going to make you look like the office wanker that can’t do anything except kiss ass. You’ll end up losing everyone’s respect for you.
There’s a better way, an authentic way.
Don’t kiss ass. Bust your ass instead.
Be a kick-ass superstar that’s dependable, doesn’t fuck around and gets shit done right and on time and even helps others become superstars themselves.
When you do this, not only will you win over your boss, you’ll be the boss soon.
Feel Better,
[Cubicle|Therapy]
Short answer - fuck no.
Brown-nosing all the time is just going to make you look like the office wanker that can’t do anything except kiss ass. You’ll end up losing everyone’s respect for you.
There’s a better way, an authentic way.
Don’t kiss ass. Bust your ass instead.
Be a kick-ass superstar that’s dependable, doesn’t fuck around and gets shit done right and on time and even helps others become superstars themselves.
When you do this, not only will you win over your boss, you’ll be the boss soon.
Feel Better,
[Cubicle|Therapy]